--- title: "One If by Clam, Two If by Sea (S03E04) | familyguy.co.uk" canonical: "https://familyguy.co.uk/episodes/s03e04-one-if-by-clam-two-if-by-sea/" updatedDate: 2026-09-06 author: Alex Moss description: "One If by Clam, Two If by Sea: Family Guy season 3 episode 4 (S03E04), first aired 1 August 2001. Writer and director credits." --- # One If by Clam, Two If by Sea Episode 4 of Family Guy season 3 (S03E04), the 32nd Family Guy episode overall. Written by Jim Bernstein and Michael Shipley and directed by Dan Povenmire. First broadcast on 1 August 2001. ## Story A hurricane flattens most of Quahog but spares the Drunken Clam. Its owner sells up and moves to Florida, and the buyer, an Englishman named Nigel Pinchley, turns the bar into a British pub. Peter, Quagmire, Cleveland and Joe respond by boarding a British ship and dumping its beer overboard. The pub burns down the next night and the four are jailed for it. In prison, Steve Bellows, a criminal Joe once arrested, plans to kill them. Meanwhile Stewie bets Brian he can rid Nigel's daughter Eliza of her Cockney accent, and loses when she reverts at a party. Lois, Bonnie and Loretta discover that Nigel drew a large insurance payout the day before the fire, and Lois gets him to confess. The men are freed and the Clam is restored, while Nigel is hanged in London and Eliza is sent to an orphanage. ## Facts | Fact | Detail | | --- | --- | | Season | 3 | | Episode | 4 of 22 | | Overall | No. 32 | | Code | S03E04 | | First aired | 1 August 2001 | | Directed by | Dan Povenmire | | Written by | Jim Bernstein and Michael Shipley | | Production code | 2ACX19 | | Source | Wikipedia: Family Guy season 3 | | Wikidata | Q843387 | | IMDb | tt0576953 | | Verification | Checked against Wikidata and IMDb: title, date, numbering and credits agree | | US viewers | 5.82 million | ## Voices | Voice | Characters | | --- | --- | | Seth MacFarlane | Peter Griffin, Brian Griffin, Stewie Griffin | | Alex Borstein | Lois Griffin, Loretta Brown, Tricia Takanawa | | Seth Green | Chris Griffin | | Mila Kunis | Meg Griffin | | Lori Alan | Diane Simmons | | Edward Asner | Steve Bellows | | John G. Brennan | Horace | | Tara Strong | Eliza Pinchley, Maria Jimenez | | Mike Henry | Cleveland Brown | | Hugh Laurie | Bar Patron | Principal voice credits as recorded by IMDb, which lists up to ten credits per episode, so recurring characters can be missing here. Guest voices below come from Wikipedia and TVmaze. ### Guest voices - Patrick Warburton as Joe Swanson - Jennifer Tilly as Bonnie Swanson - Lori Alan as Diane Simmons - Edward Asner as Steven Bellows ## Links - Season: [3](https://familyguy.co.uk/episodes/season-3/) - Source: [Wikipedia: Family Guy season 3](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Family_Guy_season_3) - Wikidata: [Q843387](https://www.wikidata.org/wiki/Q843387) - IMDb: [tt0576953](https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0576953/) - US viewers: [5.82 million](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Family_Guy_season_3) ## Navigation - Previous: [S03E03 Mr. Griffin Goes to Washington](https://familyguy.co.uk/episodes/s03e03-mr-griffin-goes-to-washington/) - Next: [S03E05 And the Wiener Is...](https://familyguy.co.uk/episodes/s03e05-and-the-wiener-is/) - Season hub: [Season 3](https://familyguy.co.uk/episodes/season-3/) - All episodes: [Family Guy episode guide](https://familyguy.co.uk/episodes/) ## Season 3: episode 4 of 22 - S03E01 [The Thin White Line](https://familyguy.co.uk/episodes/s03e01-the-thin-white-line/) - S03E02 [Brian Does Hollywood](https://familyguy.co.uk/episodes/s03e02-brian-does-hollywood/) - S03E03 [Mr. Griffin Goes to Washington](https://familyguy.co.uk/episodes/s03e03-mr-griffin-goes-to-washington/) - S03E04 One If by Clam, Two If by Sea (this entry) - S03E05 [And the Wiener Is...](https://familyguy.co.uk/episodes/s03e05-and-the-wiener-is/) - S03E06 [Death Lives](https://familyguy.co.uk/episodes/s03e06-death-lives/) - S03E07 [Lethal Weapons](https://familyguy.co.uk/episodes/s03e07-lethal-weapons/) - S03E08 [The Kiss Seen Around the World](https://familyguy.co.uk/episodes/s03e08-the-kiss-seen-around-the-world/) - S03E09 [Mr. Saturday Knight](https://familyguy.co.uk/episodes/s03e09-mr-saturday-knight/) - S03E10 [A Fish Out of Water](https://familyguy.co.uk/episodes/s03e10-a-fish-out-of-water/) - S03E11 [Emission Impossible](https://familyguy.co.uk/episodes/s03e11-emission-impossible/) - S03E12 [To Love and Die in Dixie](https://familyguy.co.uk/episodes/s03e12-to-love-and-die-in-dixie/) - S03E13 [Screwed the Pooch](https://familyguy.co.uk/episodes/s03e13-screwed-the-pooch/) - S03E14 [Peter Griffin: Husband, Father... Brother?](https://familyguy.co.uk/episodes/s03e14-peter-griffin-husband-father-brother/) - S03E15 [Ready, Willing, and Disabled](https://familyguy.co.uk/episodes/s03e15-ready-willing-and-disabled/) - S03E16 [A Very Special Family Guy Freakin' Christmas](https://familyguy.co.uk/episodes/s03e16-a-very-special-family-guy-freakin-christmas/) - S03E17 [Brian Wallows and Peter's Swallows](https://familyguy.co.uk/episodes/s03e17-brian-wallows-and-peters-swallows/) - S03E18 [From Method to Madness](https://familyguy.co.uk/episodes/s03e18-from-method-to-madness/) - S03E19 [Stuck Together, Torn Apart](https://familyguy.co.uk/episodes/s03e19-stuck-together-torn-apart/) - S03E20 [Road to Europe](https://familyguy.co.uk/episodes/s03e20-road-to-europe/) - S03E21 [Family Guy Viewer Mail #1](https://familyguy.co.uk/episodes/s03e21-family-guy-viewer-mail-1/) - S03E22 [When You Wish Upon a Weinstein](https://familyguy.co.uk/episodes/s03e22-when-you-wish-upon-a-weinstein/) --- Unofficial fan resource. Not affiliated with, endorsed by, or sponsored by FOX, Disney, or Fuzzy Door Productions.